Tag Archives: illness

“Live” Grieving

“Live” Grieving is the process in which you are able to grieve, about someone while they are living. It is the time in which you are able to grieve in real time.

If you are dealing with cancer or a terminal illness, you know what a bleak future might look like. But the time you have now can be seen as utterly more precious.

I do not like to look at life, with the idea, that the future is one-hundred percent set in stone. Some may like that, when life is going swell, and everything is looking up. However, when a downturn in life, changes the outlook, I do not like to be trapped in a no-happy-ending-story. Therefore I choose to adopt a set of beliefs, that look for and pursue that which is opportunity, possibility, and infinite hope.

No matter how much your future may look like a dead-end, there is no better day than today, to decide that you can become something more.

I saw a family a few months ago, and they had two kids. The youngest was as healthy as could be, but the oldest was in a wheelchair completely disabled, in a sort of M.S. form. I could not take my eyes off of the family, as I looked at them, and realized that they all had a love for each other that was purely genuine. I enjoyed just sitting in the restaurant and watching them give and receive love freely.

I felt their story, as I ate my dinner, and thought about their journey as a family. I could see their love for each other in the tenderness that they treated each other with. I could see how they equally and individually loved each of their children.

I know the question, that some would ask, if your one child was born disabled, why would you have another child. But that would be ignorant to the love that this family shared. To them they were grateful for everything that the Lord had blessed them with, and because they were thankful with a grateful heart, they were able to enjoy all that they had to the most joyous peak of capacity.

To see one’s days as numbered, as I was talking with someone recently, I explained how I was more grateful to have someone pass away, with a long-term or known date of death. At least in that way, I would have had my time to say good-bye and move on, asking last minute questions, and allowing a live grieving process to take place.

I can honestly say, that some of the worst circumstances to come to mind, is the sudden death, or when you go to look up a long past friend, to find out that they died, and are no longer reachable. In these types of ways, I see them as worse as cancer, because there was no letting go. One minute someone is here, and the next they are gone forever.

Perhaps, when you are faced with a dreadful situation, you will reflect on some encouraging ways to look at your life now, and find some simple inspiration.